Helping Ukranian refugees: a personal diary
Maria Radosh, Poznań, Western Poland
PSYCHOLOGIST
11/3/22: A few days ago, we welcomed some Ukrainian refugees into our home. There were three women, including one who was pregnant, as well as five children aged between 3-15 years. Less than a week earlier, the women returned from work to find their homes destroyed and their husbands had gone to fight the war. The women made the difficult decision to take their children and flee to Poland for safety.
On greeting the women and children to Poznań, we realised that they travelled with minimal luggage. They needed everything from spare clothing, panties, socks, sanitary napkins, toothbrushes and toys. So, I called my neighbours together and we managed to organise everything, including bedding, a dental appointment for a woman with terrible tooth pain and a visit to the gynaecologist for the pregnant woman. We are also trying to organise a visit with a psychologist for the two youngest children because they have not spoken for several days and won’t come out from under the bed covers.
Today, we also discovered that a local Ukrainian woman who has lived in our town for several years, has been looking after 19 refugees, including six children, in her 30 m2 apartment. When we found out this information, we started looking for neighbours who have more space and can offer them a place to stay. Tomorrow, we’ll be driving to a town 70 km away to pick up a washing machine that someone has kindly donated to help support the refugees.
Yesterday, we heard about a 7-year-old boy who reached the border between Slovakia and Poland. His parents wrote the phone number of a family member who lives in Poland on his arm, and then sent him to make the journey by himself. The parents had decided to stay and fight for their country! Everything is so crazy; it seems that the world has turned upside down! However, we are so grateful to have a roof over our heads, a warm home, and a refrigerator full of food.
12/3/22: Thank you for sending money! When I wrote to you about what’s happening here, it was not my intent to ask for money. But, of course, this money will not be wasted and will help in supporting the refugees in our town. Thank you for your support and for praying for us. Let me just add that, so far, any aid received to support Ukrainian refugees in Poland has been the action of ordinary people and NGO’s.
18/3/22: During this past week, there have been three trains daily from the Eastern border to Poznań, and on each train there are between 800 and 1000 Ukrainian people! They get off at the train station with nothing. When the train comes into the station, each carriage has a table with homemade soup, sandwiches, water, bananas and chocolate and when the people disembark the train, they consume everything that is available. With the help of our neighbours, we managed to prepare almost 400 sandwiches and they were given away within 15 minutes.
People from our street have also set up some tents near the train station because it is very cold. There are heaters in these tents, so the children can warm themselves, wash, change and eat. Sometimes we also have a few soft toys for the children. And so, it goes day by day. Many people help and bring food, but it's still not enough. It has been emotionally challenging for the local people who are working hard to offer support knowing that it is not enough. The refugees arriving have physical needs but there is serious concern for their emotional and mental health. Today, I managed to find a Ukrainian child psychologist who is a refugee also, so this will be of great help.
In a word: we fight and do not give up. But I wonder how much strength and resources we will have, because the number of people will only increase and each person has almost nothing. Thank God people are banding together because there is so much to do.
23/3/2022: Thank you for your support, it has allowed us to source a larger car to transport the boxes of food and items for donation. Today, the sixth delivery has been delivered and the cartons of bananas always arouse great joy with the kids. When I brought bananas for the first time, the kids just jumped into them because they have very little fresh food at their disposal.
I have also bought over 500 litres of milk, 60 kg of cheese, 800 yoghurts, 500 litres of water and 500 litres of juice for the children which has only made about 140 total care packages. It seems like a huge number, but there are 1,300 people in the hall and 300 children, it is still not enough. Today, we also bought dog food because there are many people who have brought their four-legged friends. We have decided to do two trips per week to purchase food and items in two large cars. We realise that this is a marathon, not a sprint so we are trying to manage our resources to reduce the physical and psychological burden of the volunteers.
4/4/2022: Hello! It was hard for me to find time this week to write because we have delivered food to the halls every day. Even today I went there after the Sabbath started so that they would have something special on Saturday. It takes a long time to do the shopping, repackage the items, and transport it to the people, travelling 60 km both ways. I also find that some people want to have a chat and then I learn patience because I do not understand their language much, but it is more important to take time and listen.
One of the women had a birthday yesterday and told me about it. I offered her my best wishes, hugged her and we both cried. She started telling me that her husband is in the military and they recently built their dream house. Everyone had their own beautiful room and the children were happy. They lived in that house for two weeks and one of the first bombs that fell in Irpien fell on their house, leaving only a hole in the ground. Fortunately, they were all out and she managed to keep the children from seeing this nightmare. I keep asking myself what I deserved for all the blessings that I have received and what this poor woman deserved for such a tragedy. I can't figure it out somehow. Unfortunately, each of the people there in this hall has a traumatic history of their own.
Today, I also delivered a whole carton of basic medicines for colds, sore throats, runny noses, painkillers, etc. All the volunteers have started to feel tired but we try to support each other and smile at the people despite the circumstances. Please pass on our gratitude to the donors. Refugees thank us and we thank you. Thanks to your support, we can make the present world in which these people live now is at least a little more friendly. Thanks to you they have fresh bread every day!
In the last delivery, we purchased 120 pairs of shower flip-flops, because the sanitary conditions with this number of people can be difficult, 100 pieces of nail scissors and clippers, 10 cartoons of garbage bags, because the people do not have suitcases or bags, so they keep their "treasures" in garbage bags.
05/04/2022: During our twice weekly shopping trips we have become skilled at filling every inch in the car to the absolute maximum. Imagine the bread wrapped in foil, placed under each seat, allowing an additional two large baskets of 20 bread each!
On the one hand, it is a very satisfying experience. The possibility of feeding these people gives us all great joy. However, when we come to this hall, where there are mainly women with children, where the light is shining around the clock, where almost 1000 people are crowded in basically one open space, where the clothes they wear are a collection of gifts from people, where even panties have been donated, we have a very strange and uncomfortable feeling. I do not even know how to name it, but it is a sense of guilt that in a moment I will return to a warm house, to my own bed, to my couch and my favourite tea mug, but for them you can't even see the light in the tunnel. It is a very difficult, painful and mentally stressful experience for anyone who engages in helping. However, we do not give up, we only act.
I personally can thank you for allowing me to exercise in the gym without even going to the gym! Every Monday and Thursday, I have the opportunity to carry 250kg of bananas from the supply truck to my car. Today, for example, I carried 100 kg of capsicums, 50 kg of green cucumbers plus 60 loaves, 10 cartons of juices for children, 30 kg of apples and countless cans filled with all sorts of food.
Imagine one of the big problems we face is disposable tableware! Cups, plates, cutlery. There is no kitchen in these halls where you can wash the dishes so you have to use paper. However, 1000 plates and 1000 cups are only enough for one meal – and they don't know what to do with it. One is environmental protection, the second is the production of garbage, and the third is the cost of such one supply for one time. Today, I wrote it all down and I'm shocked. Such a one-time package is almost $600 and we keep trying to find solutions for all these problems that arise.
During the past 3 weeks, the people facing difficult situations arrived but they still had some luggage, even just a small suitcase. We have noticed the people arriving now are in a bad mental state and often carry nothing! It is sad to see, we do not know how to help them and the language barrier makes it difficult to support them by talking or simply listening. Strong hugs, most often accompanied by holding back tears, must suffice.
These are our everyday problems that we face. I am full of admiration and respect for all the people who volunteer here and support the refugees, but I would also like to express my gratitude to all of you who support our fight here from a distance.
These personal reflections have been translated and shared by Dr Edyta Jankiewicz, who is currently serving as Assoc. Min. Sec. (WIM) at the SPD. She has a MMin in Family Life and a PhD in Religious Education, and her professional interests include family and interpersonal relations, as well as faith formation and discipleship. She currently resides in Australia and is married to Darius and has two young adult daughters, Caitlin and Ashley.